I am the god of my own universe.

Valentine's Day is just a scam perpetrated by the floral industrial complex. I hate valentine's day. And I'm not saying that because I'm bitter. Even if I had a girlfriend, I would probably only get her stuff because I felt obligated to do so. Wouldn't want her to feel left out, blah blah blah. But I would do so lovingly. Trust me, if I don't want to get someone something, I won't. And sometimes I just buy shit for people for no reason whatsoever other than I want to. I'm selfishly unselfish, if that makes sense. Most of the time, I would rather get someone else something than get myself something. Something about seeing the surprised look on their face just makes my insides feel warm.

I was going to have lunch with a pretty girl today, too. I think the fact that it was valentine's day and we're both single is just coincidence. I don't know if she viewed it as a "date" or not. I didn't. I look at it as lunch. We both have to eat right? Why not eat together? That kind of mentality is healthy I think. Because most women misinterpret the word "date". So I try not to use it, ever. I think the miscommunication is if you ask someone "hey, want to go on a date" they might think "oh god, he loves me." or "he just wants to have sex with me". So I just ask them if they want to get food. And don't really care if they view it as a date or not, because I sure as hell don't. As far as I'm concerned, that word isn't even in my vocabulary. Anyway, oh yeah I cancelled on her. Not cancel, postpone until next weekend. I just didn't feel like going out for lunch with a pretty girl to be honest. My mind just isn't in the right place right now. I have tests, research papers, homework, oral presentations, and a lot of personal shit going on. Hopefully by next weekend, I will be a little less stressed out. Surprisingly, she understood and didn't seem upset at all. Win.


What else? Oh yeah, I get to go to Nick's valentine's party at school today. That should be fun I suppose. Nick will be there and he's my favorite person so it shouldn't be too bad. I actually don't mind kids. I'm not crazy about kids, but I definitely don't hate kids. I suppose it should be important to look at these kids as his friends and that I should like them. And try to get to know the parents of those kids in case he gets invited to parties or something.

Anything else? I have 2 hours before the party, so I still need to go buy candy or something to bring the little children. I still need to eat (why did I cancel lunch) and do some studying for the Deviance test on Monday morning. It's supposed to be a really f*cking nice weekend weather wise. I'm just gonna sit in the backyard, study Deviance shit, listen to blues music, and watch Nick play with the dogs. Pertaining to the title of this post, I am the god of my own universe. I control my own destiny.